Time Guards - A Warning To Fellow TT's

dave_kinky

dave_kinky

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Time Guards - A Warning To Fellow TT\'s

Have any other Time Travellers out there been threatened by Time Guards recently?

I hope you all recall them from Chrono's original thread 'I am from the year 2522 blah blah blah'?

You can tell who they are because they wear gold jump suits, silver helmets with wings sticking out of the side and have 'Time Guard' written in Arabic (don't ask) on their backs in six inch high neon capitals? They also drive big silver hovercars with 'Time Guard-mobile' written in Arabic (again, don't ask) in 4 foot high lettering on the side and they carry ray guns?

I'm only asking because I was approached by two of them after my most recent time-trip to the future and threatened with a ray gun. Apparently the Chief Time Guard, Zazzerprast Ken Wilberforce IIIV, is now in the employ of the Lizard Men as a kind of ludicrously-dressed fifth columnist traitor. He is being plied with all manner of exotic cakes and a menagerie of muscle trees to betray the human race and help the Lizard Men conquer the Earth once and for all. He is giving the Lizard Men clones of Skaaran warriors, small pink boxes of Lunarium and all the mice they can eat in return.

(I say he is 'ludicrously-dressed' due to him wearing a turqoise battle suit with purple racing stripes with floating neon signs in orbit around him flashing 'Chief Time Guard' non-stop. Plus he wears a luminous green wig. You may not find it that ludicrous but turqoise is practically outlawed in the future and the Lizard Men plan to bring it back into fashion with a new line in jumpsuits and summer dresses as part of their dastardly plan.)

Anyway I was threatened by the Time Guards due to my open sharing of Lizard Men based knowledge on this very forum, so just be careful fellow travellers!

Love always
Dave/Chrono
 
Re: Time Guards - A Warning To Fellow TT\'s

No, just think how much trouble I could get into with the Time Guards if I gave you a slice of 26th century muscle tree gateaux! Your primitive 21st century tastebuds wouldn't be able to handle it!

I forgot to add - after I was threatened by the business end of the Time Guard's raygun they metamorphosed into a harmless milkman and lad on a milkfloat. I interrogated the Chrono molecule in my brain and hidden away in its dank recesses was the revelation that....dan dan dern!!!....

IT WAS A TERRORIST MILKFLOAT THAT DESTROYED BIG BEN USING MILKBOTTLES FULL OF LUNARIUM-LACED SEMTEX AS ITS WEAPONS OF NOT VERY MUCH DESTRUCTION!!

Fellow Time People and Primitives From The 21st Century...i believe CORRUPT TIME GUARDS FROM THE 26TH CENTURY WILL TRY TO PROMPT MONTHS OF REBUILDING AND TIDYING UP OF BIG BEN AFTER IT IS SLIGHTLY DAMAGED BY A TIME-GUARDMOBILE MASQUERADING AS A MILKFLOAT!!

VERY SOON!

D/C

UNLESS THEY DECIDE THEY CAN'T BE ARSED TO DO IT AFTER ALL!
 
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